THIS is Happiness......

Dear Santa,

All I want for Christmas is a red bicycle, and to sit on your lap all day long.

Love, Me

Our Son

I have been debating for quite a while about writing this and posting it here. I guess mostly because this has always been a happy, light-hearted blog and this is not really happy, light-hearted subject matter. But being as this is a blog about our family, and more specifically our children, I feel like I would be remiss in not even mentioning it and pretending like it never happened. Because he did happen.

Being as most of our readers here are family and close friends and most of you know the story, I'm going to spare you the gory details. Suffice it to say, I was pregnant, things didn't go well, and we lost our second son at 20 weeks. If you think it made it easier that we knew he had a birth defect, it didn't. If you think it was easier because we knew even if he made it to term, he would never come home from the hospital, it wasn't. And if you think things are "better" this way, you're wrong. Things aren't better this way. I'm not saying they're worse either. Things just....are.

Things just ARE going to be a little different than we hoped, and we're trying to wrap our heads around that. Sometimes we just can't help wishing that things were different, somehow.

You should know that we are really doing okay. Most days we don't even talk about it. Not because we don't want to...it just doesn't come up. We know we will have another child. Pregnancy won't be all fun and games this time around, we will be working closely with a perinatologist and I'm sure it will be pretty stressful until we know everything is okay. But we know in our hearts that someday Tyler will have a little brother or sister to play with and torment, just as we know that our family will always feel just the tiniest bit incomplete because our second son is missing.

At the end of the day, we return to something our priest told us, a message that is echoed everywhere from bereavement blogs to support groups to the Bible to Harry Potter, and what it lacks in originality it makes up for in being pretty darn profound. You must live life for the living. Period. And I agree. We are so thankful to have our precious Tyler and believe me when I say this experience has taught us how lucky we are to have him here with us, everyday. He is not quite three and has already taught us so much about how life should be lived, about letting go and about finding joy in everyday situations. He is our salvation, our bright spot, our reason for being. And today we are going to cherish him, and let the rest come as it will.

My Goofball

A Recap (aka 1/5 Of My Life Has Passed Since My Mom Last Blogged)

Ohhhh, where to begin? First, my mom apologizes for being such a blogosphere slackster. I am just such a handfull these days that she doesn't even really have time to think, much less write coherent thoughts and post pictures. Not that anyone accuses this blog of being full of coherent thoughts, but it's written by a toddler, so you knew what you were getting into.

Okay, let's pick up where we left off. This is gonna be a long one people, so if you're not comfy, if you need a snack (preferably goldfish) or to go to the bathroom, I would do it now. Unless you're me, then you can do it anytime because I think potty-training is for conformists and I have no intentions of being any such thing.

Here we go. November. This November was a special one. My mommy and daddy left me for the first time (well, for more than one day) and got to go on a trip that they have been wanting to go on for quite some time. They went to Egypt with my Mimi and Pops!!! I was NOT invited to go along (*huff*) but ultimately the joke was on them because I spent the whole 10 days with my Gramette and G-Pa and was spoiled completely rotten. The fact that Gramette and G-Pa took me to Hondo to see all my Aelvote cousins furthered my spoilage. I was perfectly good-natured and the life of the partay. I sure fooled them!!! I put some pictures of what my mommy and daddy were up to while they were gone at the end of this post.

On to December. I was in a Christmas program for my school. We *sang* Jingle Bell Rock. Actually, most of us just stared in awe out at the crowd. Then we spent Christmas back in Hondo with all of the cousins. I wasn't *quite* as cheerful on this trip, but I was still pretty good. Santa came to my great-greandparents house like usual, and he 100% terrified me. I've included pictures in case you don't believe me. There's just something about fat guys in red....I don't know. It's scary.

For New Years, we went to Roswell and saw my girlfriend Avery and her new sister Alice! We also saw baby Cash and Mimi and Pops and lots of mommy and daddy's friends. The rest of January passed quickly, and the topper was that my Gramette came and spent a week with me at the end of the month! I just love my Gramette.

February was very exciting! My friend Reed came to see me all the way from Cape Cod (that's Massachusetts, people!). He brought his mommy and daddy and his brother Chase and his sister Cate. And then, my friend Maddox came down too and brought his brothers and his sister Emersyn. We all had a big slumber party and it was soooo much fun! I was very confused after everyone left and continued to ask about Reed and Maddox for days! While they were here, we went to the zoo and ate philly cheesesteaks and the mommies drank lots of wine. There are some zoo pictures down there too.

Okay, we're up to the current month. March started with some snow and with Aunt Anna and Uncle Zac coming to visit! And then right when they left, Gramette and G-pa came! I had a great time hanging out with them during the day, and G-pa taught me lots of things about balloons and their magical powers. I think he's rad.

And...that's about it, I guess. You can see that we have had a steady stream of activities that have kept my mommy quite occupied.

Some of my favorite things right now: clocks (like the Mickey Mouse watch my G-pa bought me), balloons, bulldozers, knives, sunglasses, goldfish, pretzels, chocolate, playing in Daddy's truck and pulling the dog's tail.

I am talking up a storm. Some of my favorite things to say: NO, MINE, I got a balloon, I got a sharp knife, I like *insert food item*, I wanna watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse

I also have decided that television is okay. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse is my favorite show and I can name all of the characters and sing all of the songs. I like Nemo pretty well too.

Okay, my toddler brain is exhausted. Are you asleep? Just in case you're not, here are some pictures............

Halloween!

I had great fun for the second time trick or treating in Old Colorado City! I was a BIG MEAN lion for Halloween and walked around growling and saying "tickoteet" to everyone! My friends Sam (that cute monkey) and Jack (that awesome Batman) came with me! I was a sucker for suckers this year, and still ask for one daily...*sigh*. Oh Willy Wonka....you own us!!!!!



And yes, my Mommy took me to Saturday night Mass....IN my costume!!!!!

Fall Fun at the Pumpkin Patch

We went to Wishing Star Farms in early October and I had a blast! This was my first time at the pumpkin patch and there was lots to see and do there. I rode a pony and a train with my Mommy, I took a hayride with my Daddy, and I participated in some PDA with a lucky pumpkin!








I liked that train so much that I just ran around behind it for a while.....then my mom and Dad felt bad for me and bought me another ticket!!!!

My Girlfriend Comes To Town

This is my girlfriend Avery.....


She's a hottie, huh? She came to visit me with her Mommy and Daddy in August. We had a great time. Well, at least I had a great time. Avery wasn't always so appreciative of my attempts to smush her, squash her, and splash her. But we managed to get some good pictures anyway......

The "Boop"

I went to the lake over Labor Day weekend. It was fun. I got to ride in the "boop" and even went on a tube with my Mommy!!!!

My Daddy's Shirt

It is a curious power that a Daddy's shirt holds. I keep one with me most times. I sleep with one, I carry one around with me, I have one in the car.

I also don't mind having it buttoned around my neck, thusly transforming me into SUPER TYLER!!!!

My Mom is a Loser (the Birthday Post)

My parents suck. Did I have a party for my second birthday? Nope. Family in town? Nope. Presents? Not really. They bought me stuff for my big boy room. Who wants a stupid big boy room anyway?

They did take me to the zoo though. And to America the Beautiful Park to play in the water fountain. And they made me a cupcake. So, you know...I guess it wasn't all bad.....

The Emporer's New Clothes

Here's a picture of Tyler's new winter coat for Gramette! Won't he be ADORABLE???

I'm On A Boat!!!!!!

I got my swim trunks and my flippie floppies..........



**sorry this picture had to be scanned in**

Summertiiiiiiiiime!

I just love summer! Playing outside is my idea of a good time. And what better to play outside with than the waterhose? Especially since we live in Colorado and there is not a pool readily available to us (ahhhh, to be in Odessa with Gramette and G-pa....now that is a pool I dig). And once I get used to the cold, I am one happy popsicle eater. Now if only it would stop raining everyday.......